Nellie's last birthday interview

It's obvious that my first baby child would also be my first adult child, but it still seems strange somehow. Nellie is a bit of a paradox of her own, though. Fiercely independent but prefers to be around people. Marches to the beat of her own drum (forever) but led the band as drum major. Is registered to take both organic chemistry and music theory in her first semester at MSU. 

An 18th birthday is a little bittersweet as we look toward big changes in our everyday family life next year! Nellie is headed to MSU to study plant biology and flute performance. She'll live on campus, so the discussion of who gets their own room(s) is on and heated. Looking at the past year, it has been FULL of activity and excitement. She was head drum major in the marching band and took three AP classes. She spent many many hours applying to colleges and writing essays and scholarship applications. She practiced flute endlessly to prepare for music school auditions, and made it into the All-State Band. She auditioned, and then she waited. She saw the fruits of her labor. We celebrated. Through all of it, we watched Nellie's friendships grow and her values and beliefs deepen and most of all, we enjoyed our time with her. She's learned a lot, and like all of us, has a lot to learn. But - she is headed out into the world, and she is ready!

August

September

October

November

December

January

February

March

April

May

June

July

The old days

This is it! Your last interview. I really only have a couple of questions. First, you're going to meet so many new people who don't know your family or your childhood. So - what's your elevator speech? What was it like to grow up as a Wernet?

Growing up in a big family is a blessing and curse in many ways, especially being the oldest child. From a young age I had a lot of responsibility. I've been treated like an adult for a long time so turning 18 doesn't feel that different in that respect! Our family is really weird and silly and goofy. But underlying that is a lot of love. As annoying as you and Dad can get sometimes - well let's just say in some ways it's a Christian, traditional household, but we're also a random, out-of-pocket, funny family in some ways. Like one day you won't let me go to the mall because I haven't spent enough time at home, then then next I'm telling a friend about something that happened and they're like, "I would never get away with that at my house!"

Having a lot of younger siblings is really nice because there's no limit to the possibilities on what you can do. You can max out your characters on Mario Kart or play 2v2 basketball. If you want to do something - take a walk after dinner, go to the library at the last minute - someone will want to go with you. It was really nice growing up watching the rest of my siblings grow up. Lately, for example, DJ seems really grown up and he, Annie, and I can hang out as friends. Watching them grow and change and mature has been really interesting. Annie is probably my best friend, ever, which is really cool.

I will say, there have been a lot of rules and restrictions on ME that I'll bet the other kids aren't going to have. 😏 And it was interesting being the only kid at Grand Ledge while the others were at LCS. I think my experience in our family will be unique.

So if I had to sum up our family, the title of your blog is pretty apt. We say we're not that crazy, but kind of...we are. And that's a beautiful thing.

What advice do you have for Annie, DJ, Eddie, and Mary as you "move on?"

Don't forget your favorite sister! To the oldest three, don't let Mary get away with too much. To Annie, you're the oldest now, and that comes with responsibility. I think you'll have an easier go of it, though. Going into junior and senior year, try not to stress out too much because there are a lot of things that seem really big that aren't that important. You're passionate about and talented in lots of things, and that can be hard because you're trying to divide your time. Take deep breaths, find balance. I'm only a call away if you ever need me! 

To DJ, I would say take it easy, be chill. I think we're similar in the sense that we feel a strong sense of responsibility for what the younger siblings do, and that can mean bossiness and control issues. It's all going to be okay. You are the one thing in life you can control! And that's okay. You have a great mind. You're really smart, so that's going to take you far so don't get hit in the head with a baseball and you should be fine.

To Eddie, don't let yourself be overlooked! Your siblings might shine brightly and you're stuck in the middle, which can be tough, but you're the funniest person I know and weird and goofy. You offer something to the world no one else does. Speak up, feel your feelings. You're capable of just as much as the rest of us even with your big, bold siblings.

To Mary, you are a fiery person. Don't let that fire burn out but don't let it turn into a wildfire. Stay sassy, stay bold, stay bright. That will take you far in life! But know your limits and when to reign it in. You've always been our "sweet and spicy" girl. Be content, find joy. Don't let yourself get spoiled! I love how excited you are about nature and being outdoors, hunting and fishing, and music! Stay wild! 

All of you - be grateful, live in the moment. Not everyone gets the family experience we do and a lot of people are worse off. Be present and don't take it for granted. It's going to be over before you know it!

Thinking back on the last 18 years, what are some core experiences that you recognize as being formational for you in getting to this point?

The most obvious one for me is breaking my leg, and then the covid era but those are wrapped up and intertwined in my mind. It was so awful in the moment, but it shaped me the most. It taught me about pain, relying on others, asking for help, needing to lean on people. All experiences, even the painful ones, are inherently beneficial. Our lives are a culmination of everything we've experienced on earth. Everything I've done, everyone I've met, everything that's happened, shaped me into the person I am now. So I don't think I would really change anything.

Freshman year band camp really cemented a lot of the most important friendships I have and set me up for high school - all the people I would be friends with and my love for music.

Being in a romantic relationship taught me a lot about love and life and balance. I learned a lot about relationships.

Experiencing the death of a close family member for the first time with Aunt Pam passing away. 

Transferring to Grand Ledge from LCS was really hard in the beginning. I had a lot of anxiety, middle school was really tough. But in the end, I'm so glad I stayed. It was a blessing in disguise. People say God doesn't give you the path you want, he gives you the path that's right. I see that as God working in my life.

Many of these things weren't "good," they were hard, but they were right. I learned a lot about life. I view them as lessons, now.

Where do you hope to be in 10 years? What do you hope to be doing? What kind of person do you hope to be?

Well, 10 years...I'll be 28. I hope I'm married, or close to married. In a healthy relationship. But - I don't know, maybe no kids yet! I hope to be out of college and grad school. I hope to have a meaningful job, working in something that's good and helpful for others and the environment. Something impactful. I hope to still be close with all you guys and with my friends. I want to still talk to my high school friends.

I want to be the kind of person who is passionate and determined. [I'm not worried about her not being that.] Who strives to do good and be good in my everyday life. I hope to still be the cool older sister, someone to look up to. [It's already wild to me how much Nellie's decisions, like being in band or trying out for that first musical, have influenced the other kids' interests.]

I think that's it. Is there a final question? [Do you want there to be? Any last words?]

I'm grateful to everything who's read all these birthday interviews! Who have watched me grow up. All the grandparents and aunts and uncles and family friends who have supported our family and me. Thanks for sticking it out, for having faith in me and seeing good when I can't see it myself. I love all of you!

We love you, Nellie.

Quality time with Nellie

We've had a lot of good times with Nellie this winter as she lives out her senior year as a flute player and future music major. 🤞We've been to Holland, Grand Rapids, Kalamazoo, Haslett, and East Lansing in the last couple of months for auditions, lessons, and All-State Band - and we're not done yet! It's been fun, though a tiny bit stressful as a parent waiting and hoping.

First was the All-State Band prep and concert in Grand Rapids. Kevin and I met Nellie after work on Thursday and stayed through Saturday. We got to stay at the Amway Grand, which was an experience in itself! It felt very metropolitan, and we got to eat good food and go ice skating at the Rosa Parks Circle ice rink, which was a highlight even though I was terrified about broken bones the whole time. And it was freezing. The concert was beautiful and we were blessed and thankful to have lots of family there!

Ready to perform!

Fancy dinner the first night

Skating!

It was totally her idea, and I'm glad we went.

With the best music teachers around!

It was hard to get a picture, but here are the flutes!

The view in the hotel

The view from the hotel

As soon as that was over, it was time to audition. We were at WMU, Hope, and MSU all within a week. The WMU audition was a fun way to spend Valentine's Day - we carpooled with Nellie's bestie and her mom and we got to introduce them to our favorite coffee shop!

Waiting at WMU

Before

After

Waiting in Holland

Finally, I got to accompany Nellie for both district and state solo and ensembles. Those are always great days for me - we have a routine now that includes good food (Thai Princess) and coffee (Moka and Co.) And I've gotten over my nerves on Nellie's behalf because she's always so calm, though I definitely teared up during her solo at states. 

My favorite sign at Haslett High School

Woodwind quintet

All those notes!

A duet with Ellie, a super talented freshman! Nellie and Ellie - adorable.

Bonus photo of us driving to Hope for a flute lesson on a very snowy and cold day

It's hard to believe this particular season of our lives is coming to a close! I'm so thankful for these experiences this year.

Wernet Fall Round-Up 2024: Nellie

Nellie's main thing this fall was the Grand Ledge Marching Band. She was the senior drum major and played a flute solo, which was super cool and a little crazy. 

But the other big story in Nellie's life was college application season! She had already done most of the application before she tagged me in, and I was surprised - though I share an office with the College and Career Counselor and should know better - by what an elaborate and somewhat confusing process it all is, even with (or especially with) the Common App. I learned a lot, so hopefully I'll be better prepared for the next four go-rounds. We spent hours at the kitchen table reviewing data, navigating music school applications, looking at scholarships, and brainstorming essay topics. Nellie drafted essays on our way home from the U.P. in October. While I drove, we'd discuss, then she'd write, then we'd switch drivers, and we'd discuss and I'd edit. It was great!

There were visits to U of M with Kevin and visits to WMU and Hope College with me. Nellie continued for a third year with the Spartan Youth Wind Symphony and auditioned for the All-State Honors Band. She started three AP courses and continues to work at the Sun Theater to round out her senior year. For most of the season, we didn't really see her much! We're all thankful that marching band has wrapped up so we can spend just a little more time together. Well, I'm very thankful for that, Nellie is probably a little thankful. 

First day of senior year!

Fall Homecoming

Senior Night

Conducting at Ford Field

SYWS chamber concert

GLMB Banquet

Visiting Hope - we were both enamored with the campus

Senior pictures 💗

Nellie, age 17

 

Big cousin, little cousin

Some things never change...Nellie with a tiny toad!

Storytime with Nellie...in German

That one time we dropped off Nellie to tour Europe

First day of school

How Nellie will live in my memory for a long time!

Between band, working at the Sun Theater, a vibrant social life (including a regular Dungeons and Dragons night with friends?!), flute lessons, and kicking off summer with a trip to Germany, I felt like I never saw Nellie this spring! We even started joking about our "rare Nellie sightings." So a long vacation up north and a quieter month of July with some one-on-one hikes and a concert has been a great chance to reconnect and spend lots of quality time together. 

During last year's interview, Nellie focused on the upcoming junior year, which is known to be tough. She handled it like a pro, though, one day at a time. She successfully navigated two AP classes and continued to grow in maturity and independence as she increasingly managed her own time and responsibilities. Though I did get to witness one particular moment when she ripped up her Precalculus homework and had to tape it back together later. It's hard to believe Nellie is officially a senior (and we're senior parents). But at the same time, she was sort of born ready, running full-tilt toward adulthood, whether we're ready or not! We're hoping for a slightly quieter year as we prioritize fewer activities so we can spend as much time together as possible. I know this year will be exciting, and a little terrifying, and we will all learn a lot.

Here's a fun fact - I had to go back and look, but this is Nellie's 15th birthday interview. We started this when Nellie was 3, which makes sense because Annie was a baby and I'd given up on the idea of a baby book. We're nearing the end of this birthday interview journey!